Where is the village?

Jenn:

So we ended our last blog questioning the supposed comradery between mothers. I thought about this subject a lot this past week. Why aren't we there for each other more? As mothers we all have our trials and rather then go through them together too many times we are alone. Why is this? Too many times I have felt judged by other mothers as not being up to par, leading me to to believe that we are no longer in this together. It's every mother for herself!! I find it sad that it has to be this way. Well I guess it doesn't have to, we could all suddenly stop judging each other and just be there to lend a helping hand. However I don't believe this is going to happen. In the past(the world of our grandparents!) people would willing help others. Now not just in motherhood, but in all aspects of life we are alone. Too afraid to ask for help for fear that we will be seen as weak, or incapable. What happened to the village? Why is it that we are so afraid to ask for help?

Jamie:

Anwsering Jenn's last question, for me, I'm afraid of being judged for not being able to handle what has been thrown my way.  I think that we are raised to feel like we can do it all no matter how impossible it may be.  If we can't we're scrutinized unfavorably among our peers.  It's sad really that it is this way, really we should be feeling like it's ok to admit when we need help and to ask for it.  There has to be some way to change this, to bring back the feeling of community.  I think a way to start would be the next time you're out in public instead of judging someone who has a screaming child and asking why they don't shut their kid up, try to be understanding that it's not always as simple as that. It's no easy feat being a mother and we really need to be more sympathetic towards each other instead of comparing ourselves and our children.  No two people are alike just like snowflakes, so let's embrace our differences and stop judging each other.

You don't get any sick days when you're a mom.....

Jenn:

So earlier this week I went to go pick Gabriel up from school because he had a doctors appointment, while walking back to the car I rolled my ankle and fell to the ground. After the shock of the pain, getting Gabriel to pick Kat up,and picking myself up I hobbled to my car. I then preceded to take Gabriel to the doctor the whole way being extremely angry at my throbbing ankle and happy that I had driven my truck, not the car which is a stick shift! See I was angry because I simply do not have time to be sidelined! After rolling my ankle I still had to go to Gabriel's appointment, the grocery store, and a meeting. Really how am I supposed to elevate my foot as much as possible to prevent swelling when I barely have a chance to sit somedays!!! Well my foot feels better now but this experience has made me realize that I don't have time to be sick or injured! Kids can't take care of themselves and sometimes that really sucks. Also your house won't clean itself, dinner doesn't magically appear,and laundry doesn't do itself! Sometimes it is nice to be needed that much but when my foot hurts and i can't walk it would be nice if I had a time out card!

Jamie

A few weeks ago I came down with this horrible sinus infection which created these horrible headaches that were sensitive to light.  So needless to say I could barely do anything around the house let alone take care of the kids.  Luckily they were pretty well behaved which made it a little easier for me.  So one day after having this horrible head pounding for 6 days I called my husband to come home from work to help me with the kids which he refused.  At that point I thought to myself that it would be nice to have a nanny at times like this. Luckily the doctor was able to fix the problem, but I do have to say that when you are sick with small children  it's near impossible to function.  Looking back I should have enlisted the help of my friends and neighbors, which all the books tell you to do.  That in itself is really hard for me to do because I like to feel like I should be superwoman able to handle any situation thrown at me.  That is something that I really need to fix about myself and admit when I need help and to not feel incompetent for admitting that I can not do it all, all the time!

After rereading our posts I thought of the old saying "it takes a village to raise a child" . Well were is our village? Why is it that too many times we are alone to face our trials and test by ourselves, too afraid to admit trouble until the problem has been resolved? Maybe these questions shall be addressed in another blog as we have 4 fussy children ready for naps!

Introductions

Hello! First of all let me say we are horrible procrastinaters which is why we signed up in August and we finally started writing in mid-September! Well my name is Jenn and i will be co-authoring this blog with my friend Jamie, who I will be telling you about in a few minutes. I am 28 and I am a stay at home mom. I have two children, one is Gabriel a 9 year old boy and the other is Katherine a soon to be 9 month old girl. We live aboard Camp Pendleton with Garrett my husband of 6 years. Now I shall pass it on to Jamie so she can tell you a little about herself and family.

Hello! My name is Jamie a stay at home mother of three.  I live on Camp Pendelton with my husband of 4 years.  My kids names are Colin a 3 year old energetic boy and Andrew and Chloe 18 month old twins which by the way came completely by suprise.  I hope that this blog can help some of you other mothers out there who feel at times that they're going crazy, or don't feel like they are being "super mom".  Nice to meet you all!

I (Jenn) thought to start this blog because of Jamie actually who would call at varying times of the day wondering  why her son couldn't count to 10 yet? or was it normal for her daughter to be throwing such horrible temper tantrums? and other various dilemmas. So I talked to her about starting this blog so that we would have a place to kinda vent our issues, and other mothers would know that they weren't alone. So here it is hope you enjoy our laughter, tears, crazyiness, pain,and frustration at figuring this whole kid thing out!