Jenn:
"Mom where's my shoes?" "Mom I can't find my toy" "Mom where's my backpack?" Sound familiar? Why do our kids expect us to know the exact location of everything they have ever touched?! I usually have something smart to say like " I don't know I put it back when I used it" or "Maybe if you put it wear it belonged you would find it!" These obviously mean nothing to him considering this war has been going on for about 6 years. Why does this happen? Why hasn't my 9 year old figured out that I am not lo-jack for his stuff? It's so annoying! Everyday he has misplaced something else! Not only does HE lose it he expects ME to find it!! I mean really what does he think happens? I sneak in and hide his stuff from him? Aliens come in and use lasers to move his things while he is sleeping!! Hopefully one day he will figure that he is responsible for his things. Not me!!
Jamie:
It's funny because my three year old has started demanding that if he can't find something that I go find it for him. He'll say "you find it mom!", and I tell him that I don't have to find it and if he wants to play with it then he will have to go and look for it himself. I can't believe that it starts at such a young age, and apparently never ends. My brother who is now 30 still does it to my mom and gets extremely upset and blames everyone else for his misplaced item. It's absolutly ridiculous!! I don't know if it's a guy thing or what? I don't ask my husband to find something that I lost, I simply ask him if he's seen what I'm looking for and if he hasn't I try to think of the last place I had it. Is it really that hard to keep track of our own stuff? I mean really!
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Why do we always hurt the ones we love?
Jenn:
I think everyone has had a moment like this your frustrated,angry and your child says something to you. Anything, and you snap. You yell SHUT UP or LEAVE ME ALONE! Taking your frustration out on your innocent child. Why? Why do we do this? I have done this on more occasions then I would like to admit. I love my children more then I can say. But when I am angry they are the perfect little targets. They won't yell back. They offer no threat to me, and will still love me. Even after I have screamed at them. I feel awful after yelling at them. To my benefit, I have gotten a lot better at directing my anger at the correct person. Still sometimes I lose my patience too quickly. It's still a work in progress though.
Jamie:
So the other day I was having a dissagreement with my husband and was extremely irritated. Well, I was getting the kids up from their nap and trying to feed them. Needless to say they were fussing and my three year old comes up to me to ask for something and I lost it on him. I screamed "SHUT UP AND GO AWAY!" My husband asked me what was wrong with me and I snapped out of it. How could I just snap like that, on my little boy who wasn't doing anything wrong. I felt horrible like I wanted to slap myself. So I apologized to him and explained that he did nothing wrong it's just mommy was upset and took it out on him. I have since taken a deeper look inside myself and realized that if I just take the time to breathe a few deep breaths right when I'm at my breaking point, I can control my sudden outbursts. It's really hard for me to control my emotions and that is something I really need to work on. It's so hard to admit that kids are an easy target and too often they are used as the outlet. It's a horrible thing to think about. I know I'm guilty of it and its sad because in the end they will love me and give me a hug. Why is it that the one you should take it out on you don't? There's the saying that we always hurt the ones we love, and I really don't understand why.
Jamie:
So the other day I was having a dissagreement with my husband and was extremely irritated. Well, I was getting the kids up from their nap and trying to feed them. Needless to say they were fussing and my three year old comes up to me to ask for something and I lost it on him. I screamed "SHUT UP AND GO AWAY!" My husband asked me what was wrong with me and I snapped out of it. How could I just snap like that, on my little boy who wasn't doing anything wrong. I felt horrible like I wanted to slap myself. So I apologized to him and explained that he did nothing wrong it's just mommy was upset and took it out on him. I have since taken a deeper look inside myself and realized that if I just take the time to breathe a few deep breaths right when I'm at my breaking point, I can control my sudden outbursts. It's really hard for me to control my emotions and that is something I really need to work on. It's so hard to admit that kids are an easy target and too often they are used as the outlet. It's a horrible thing to think about. I know I'm guilty of it and its sad because in the end they will love me and give me a hug. Why is it that the one you should take it out on you don't? There's the saying that we always hurt the ones we love, and I really don't understand why.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
I love you child, but please shut up!
Jenn:
I must start this by saying my mom is going too laugh her ass off! Because I was a talker too (still am actually!) and she would say things like" God only gave you a certain amount of words and you are going to use them all by the time you are 25"!!! So when I had my adorable son and would look at him lovingly saying "I can't wait until he can talk". My mom would laugh, I never really understood why until now! My son will not,or can not stop talking! He will continue on and on about anything until I feel i might go crazy! Don't get me wrong I usually ask him to please be quite or to hush. But in the case of my son, who probably even talks in his sleep, I usually have to pull out the SHUT UP!!! Which I really don't like to say to him because no one likes to be mean to their baby. What other options do I have? I am repetedly polite and still he continues to chatter. Now I know why my mom was so cranky when she didn't get her alone time. We all need that time to think or to just hear the voices in our own heads! Just hold out for nap time or bed times mommas! It will be all right!!!!
Jamie:
So my three year old just started talking quite a lot these past few months. There are times when he says the most adorable or hillarious things. But I do have to say that it is very frusturating when I'm trying to get a few moments to myself and he just won't leave me alone. Like now for instance, I've been trying to write this blog for two days now and he's sitting practically on my lap talking to me about his airplanes. It's understandable that I am his buddy and best friend, but gosh kid please give me a minute. Also another time in the morning when I'm first waking up haven't had a chance to even get a sip of coffee and it starts mom, momma, mommy, MMMOOOOMMM!!!! WHAT!?! What do you need!? It just seems at times that it's never ending My twins are just starting to talk and oh my goodness it's cute! How mother nature really has us fooled. Here I am trying not to yell at my three year old but oohing and ahhhing at the little ones for saying toes or other such things. Ha! It's all an evil trick.
I must start this by saying my mom is going too laugh her ass off! Because I was a talker too (still am actually!) and she would say things like" God only gave you a certain amount of words and you are going to use them all by the time you are 25"!!! So when I had my adorable son and would look at him lovingly saying "I can't wait until he can talk". My mom would laugh, I never really understood why until now! My son will not,or can not stop talking! He will continue on and on about anything until I feel i might go crazy! Don't get me wrong I usually ask him to please be quite or to hush. But in the case of my son, who probably even talks in his sleep, I usually have to pull out the SHUT UP!!! Which I really don't like to say to him because no one likes to be mean to their baby. What other options do I have? I am repetedly polite and still he continues to chatter. Now I know why my mom was so cranky when she didn't get her alone time. We all need that time to think or to just hear the voices in our own heads! Just hold out for nap time or bed times mommas! It will be all right!!!!
Jamie:
So my three year old just started talking quite a lot these past few months. There are times when he says the most adorable or hillarious things. But I do have to say that it is very frusturating when I'm trying to get a few moments to myself and he just won't leave me alone. Like now for instance, I've been trying to write this blog for two days now and he's sitting practically on my lap talking to me about his airplanes. It's understandable that I am his buddy and best friend, but gosh kid please give me a minute. Also another time in the morning when I'm first waking up haven't had a chance to even get a sip of coffee and it starts mom, momma, mommy, MMMOOOOMMM!!!! WHAT!?! What do you need!? It just seems at times that it's never ending My twins are just starting to talk and oh my goodness it's cute! How mother nature really has us fooled. Here I am trying not to yell at my three year old but oohing and ahhhing at the little ones for saying toes or other such things. Ha! It's all an evil trick.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Where is the village?
Jenn:
So we ended our last blog questioning the supposed comradery between mothers. I thought about this subject a lot this past week. Why aren't we there for each other more? As mothers we all have our trials and rather then go through them together too many times we are alone. Why is this? Too many times I have felt judged by other mothers as not being up to par, leading me to to believe that we are no longer in this together. It's every mother for herself!! I find it sad that it has to be this way. Well I guess it doesn't have to, we could all suddenly stop judging each other and just be there to lend a helping hand. However I don't believe this is going to happen. In the past(the world of our grandparents!) people would willing help others. Now not just in motherhood, but in all aspects of life we are alone. Too afraid to ask for help for fear that we will be seen as weak, or incapable. What happened to the village? Why is it that we are so afraid to ask for help?
Jamie:
Anwsering Jenn's last question, for me, I'm afraid of being judged for not being able to handle what has been thrown my way. I think that we are raised to feel like we can do it all no matter how impossible it may be. If we can't we're scrutinized unfavorably among our peers. It's sad really that it is this way, really we should be feeling like it's ok to admit when we need help and to ask for it. There has to be some way to change this, to bring back the feeling of community. I think a way to start would be the next time you're out in public instead of judging someone who has a screaming child and asking why they don't shut their kid up, try to be understanding that it's not always as simple as that. It's no easy feat being a mother and we really need to be more sympathetic towards each other instead of comparing ourselves and our children. No two people are alike just like snowflakes, so let's embrace our differences and stop judging each other.
Friday, September 24, 2010
You don't get any sick days when you're a mom.....
Jenn:
So earlier this week I went to go pick Gabriel up from school because he had a doctors appointment, while walking back to the car I rolled my ankle and fell to the ground. After the shock of the pain, getting Gabriel to pick Kat up,and picking myself up I hobbled to my car. I then preceded to take Gabriel to the doctor the whole way being extremely angry at my throbbing ankle and happy that I had driven my truck, not the car which is a stick shift! See I was angry because I simply do not have time to be sidelined! After rolling my ankle I still had to go to Gabriel's appointment, the grocery store, and a meeting. Really how am I supposed to elevate my foot as much as possible to prevent swelling when I barely have a chance to sit somedays!!! Well my foot feels better now but this experience has made me realize that I don't have time to be sick or injured! Kids can't take care of themselves and sometimes that really sucks. Also your house won't clean itself, dinner doesn't magically appear,and laundry doesn't do itself! Sometimes it is nice to be needed that much but when my foot hurts and i can't walk it would be nice if I had a time out card!
Jamie
A few weeks ago I came down with this horrible sinus infection which created these horrible headaches that were sensitive to light. So needless to say I could barely do anything around the house let alone take care of the kids. Luckily they were pretty well behaved which made it a little easier for me. So one day after having this horrible head pounding for 6 days I called my husband to come home from work to help me with the kids which he refused. At that point I thought to myself that it would be nice to have a nanny at times like this. Luckily the doctor was able to fix the problem, but I do have to say that when you are sick with small children it's near impossible to function. Looking back I should have enlisted the help of my friends and neighbors, which all the books tell you to do. That in itself is really hard for me to do because I like to feel like I should be superwoman able to handle any situation thrown at me. That is something that I really need to fix about myself and admit when I need help and to not feel incompetent for admitting that I can not do it all, all the time!
After rereading our posts I thought of the old saying "it takes a village to raise a child" . Well were is our village? Why is it that too many times we are alone to face our trials and test by ourselves, too afraid to admit trouble until the problem has been resolved? Maybe these questions shall be addressed in another blog as we have 4 fussy children ready for naps!
So earlier this week I went to go pick Gabriel up from school because he had a doctors appointment, while walking back to the car I rolled my ankle and fell to the ground. After the shock of the pain, getting Gabriel to pick Kat up,and picking myself up I hobbled to my car. I then preceded to take Gabriel to the doctor the whole way being extremely angry at my throbbing ankle and happy that I had driven my truck, not the car which is a stick shift! See I was angry because I simply do not have time to be sidelined! After rolling my ankle I still had to go to Gabriel's appointment, the grocery store, and a meeting. Really how am I supposed to elevate my foot as much as possible to prevent swelling when I barely have a chance to sit somedays!!! Well my foot feels better now but this experience has made me realize that I don't have time to be sick or injured! Kids can't take care of themselves and sometimes that really sucks. Also your house won't clean itself, dinner doesn't magically appear,and laundry doesn't do itself! Sometimes it is nice to be needed that much but when my foot hurts and i can't walk it would be nice if I had a time out card!
Jamie
A few weeks ago I came down with this horrible sinus infection which created these horrible headaches that were sensitive to light. So needless to say I could barely do anything around the house let alone take care of the kids. Luckily they were pretty well behaved which made it a little easier for me. So one day after having this horrible head pounding for 6 days I called my husband to come home from work to help me with the kids which he refused. At that point I thought to myself that it would be nice to have a nanny at times like this. Luckily the doctor was able to fix the problem, but I do have to say that when you are sick with small children it's near impossible to function. Looking back I should have enlisted the help of my friends and neighbors, which all the books tell you to do. That in itself is really hard for me to do because I like to feel like I should be superwoman able to handle any situation thrown at me. That is something that I really need to fix about myself and admit when I need help and to not feel incompetent for admitting that I can not do it all, all the time!
After rereading our posts I thought of the old saying "it takes a village to raise a child" . Well were is our village? Why is it that too many times we are alone to face our trials and test by ourselves, too afraid to admit trouble until the problem has been resolved? Maybe these questions shall be addressed in another blog as we have 4 fussy children ready for naps!
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Introductions
Hello! First of all let me say we are horrible procrastinaters which is why we signed up in August and we finally started writing in mid-September! Well my name is Jenn and i will be co-authoring this blog with my friend Jamie, who I will be telling you about in a few minutes. I am 28 and I am a stay at home mom. I have two children, one is Gabriel a 9 year old boy and the other is Katherine a soon to be 9 month old girl. We live aboard Camp Pendleton with Garrett my husband of 6 years. Now I shall pass it on to Jamie so she can tell you a little about herself and family.
Hello! My name is Jamie a stay at home mother of three. I live on Camp Pendelton with my husband of 4 years. My kids names are Colin a 3 year old energetic boy and Andrew and Chloe 18 month old twins which by the way came completely by suprise. I hope that this blog can help some of you other mothers out there who feel at times that they're going crazy, or don't feel like they are being "super mom". Nice to meet you all!
I (Jenn) thought to start this blog because of Jamie actually who would call at varying times of the day wondering why her son couldn't count to 10 yet? or was it normal for her daughter to be throwing such horrible temper tantrums? and other various dilemmas. So I talked to her about starting this blog so that we would have a place to kinda vent our issues, and other mothers would know that they weren't alone. So here it is hope you enjoy our laughter, tears, crazyiness, pain,and frustration at figuring this whole kid thing out!
Hello! My name is Jamie a stay at home mother of three. I live on Camp Pendelton with my husband of 4 years. My kids names are Colin a 3 year old energetic boy and Andrew and Chloe 18 month old twins which by the way came completely by suprise. I hope that this blog can help some of you other mothers out there who feel at times that they're going crazy, or don't feel like they are being "super mom". Nice to meet you all!
I (Jenn) thought to start this blog because of Jamie actually who would call at varying times of the day wondering why her son couldn't count to 10 yet? or was it normal for her daughter to be throwing such horrible temper tantrums? and other various dilemmas. So I talked to her about starting this blog so that we would have a place to kinda vent our issues, and other mothers would know that they weren't alone. So here it is hope you enjoy our laughter, tears, crazyiness, pain,and frustration at figuring this whole kid thing out!
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